Why I Am NOT Looking Forward To Having 3 Year Old Twins
Why I Am NOT Looking Forward To Having 3 Year Old Twins
My sassy twins are 35 months, 3 weeks, and 3 days old.
In all honesty, I didn’t find newborn twins to be THAT challenging. Most people say how much work that it is or was for them. To me, it is far more work now trying to keep possessions in one piece, bodies in one piece, sanity in one piece. (And no I haven’t ‘forgotten’. Not yet anyhow..ha ha.)
Maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s just my particular duo as I have seen some well behaved twin tots who actually sit in stroller and don’t make people stop and stare. (I know I’m staring because I get jealous of them often 😯 .) I know every child has his or her moments. I am well aware of this. But for me, the challenges keep getting greater, and I find myself far more exhausted both mentally and physically at the end of the day.
Yes as newborns and infants those feedings were tough. But the long naps in between where they were actually still enough to marvel and stare at adoringly were more than worth the sore muscles in my shoulder and back. The boppy pillows help eliminate a lot of this trouble anyhow, and simultaneous feedings which I highly recommend. Though sometimes you just got to cuddle up one by one for feedings, as twin newborns are simply irresistible.
I miss my sweet, little gals 😥 .
Being that my newborns, most times, slept better then then they do now is also a big strain. We are going on 3 years here not 3 months. Why the wake up calls? I talk to other moms and they most always tell me their pair sleeps though the night for them. The moms I really despise have been lucky enough to have twins that slept through the night starting at the newborn stage forward, still take naps as toddlers, don’t throw massive fits, and play nicely with one another instead of killing each other and only playing nice whenever the mood strikes them. I call those the ‘stepford twins’, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wish my own pair were one of them.
So why am I not looking forward to 3?
1. YAPPEDY YAP YAP YAP 😀 !
They are jabber jaws already. With each passing day it seems more questions arise. I can’t drive a block in peace between all of them yapping (at once no less.) Sometimes I wish some ingenious inventor would make those sound proof, plastic partitions that taxi cabs have on regular cars and minivans as an optional feature. I’m going to safely expect that this won’t be getting better any time soon.
The tantrums came back in part to. Just when I thought they were gone forever. Now granted I got to give props to Allie, she’s never been one for tantrums (just some intense amounts of ‘sass’). But Annie is back to that, ”OMG..I’m glad that child isn’t mine, did I remember to take my birth control pill today”, phase again. It’s worse because she is older and louder. The stares are more intense than ever. I’m like, ”Lady don’t judge. I’m not forcing her to throw herself down and flop around like a fish out of water. I didn’t deny her food or water, take out a belt like my father did, or do anything in any way to cause this so stop staring with you and your seemingly perfect children. Have twins..then we’ll talk 😛 .”
2. And I thought potty training was a good thing.
I’d rather go back to diapers some days. Trips to the bathroom are a frequent, often recreational activity, whether there is a need to pee or poo or not, ‘let’s go to the bathroom.’ Let’s look under the stall and see if we can catch someone else peeing, or open the door on mom while she’s trying to pee so the whole world sees her who-ha once more. Let’s wash our hands 30 times for 30 minutes and make sure our sleeves fall down and get wet, then use way too many paper towels to dry off with. Let’s run inside and lock ourselves in bathroom stalls and touch something utterly disgusting to make mom scream out ”EWE”. It’s fun..NOT 😯 ! One vs. two is not easy in the lavatory.
3. They get more destructive
The older they get the bigger the messes and the greater the damage. My husband is doing the walls and floors right now, and I don’t understand at all why he wouldn’t wait until they turn 4 to go any further. They have already written on one piece of sheetrock, dirtied up another, but yet he continues his deed thinking things will stay flawless when all is completed ( HA HA.). He’s so utterly clueless. Their new thing is putting on shoes and kicking at the wall. Dad just loves that one.
4. They understand too much and taddle on siblings making them crazy. And for us, jealousy re-emerges again.
The girls taddle on their older siblings. Sometimes I hear, ”I hate you” and I am thinking to myself, ‘And I did this as a gift not as torture for these other poor souls.’ They seem to lose their ‘cutesy baby appeal’ around this time…(the 3 year mark). They seemingly become more of an annoyance to siblings and their personal property, than a benefit with an innocent, heart-melting smile. They are definitely more ‘real’ and require more from mom and dad in certain and many ways. This can lead to the green-eyed monster making its return. I’m very envious of those not facing that particular challenge.
5. More marital strain
For some twin moms and dads the early days may have posed more issues if their children sleep really well as tots and they are well rested themselves. But with my duo right now their unruliness contributes to some parental backlash and disagreements between my husband and I. I try and get back to that ‘we are a team’ thing, but it’s harder to do than it used to be in our home. Thank God our relationship was so strong before we had 3 children together. It’s hard work. Add multiples to your marriage and you really need to work at it all the more.
I won’t go on. I may just eat these words one day. It’s funny that on the flip side I really wish they’d stay little forever. I guess that says something, right 😆 ?
I do love my cutie pies like crazy!
*PS- Let me add for those with small twins or those pregnant with twins. I still do consider my twin girls a tremendous blessing. (Yes, despite what you read above. All parents have their frazzled moments.) The love I feel for them moves mountains and creates sunshine over the shadows of the rest of this crappola. I don’t wish it were different and I only had one, but it is tough at times. I can’t lie about that. The rewards are great but with my particular duo, actually I have never seen as boisterous a pair, this just all rings so true. Your pair may be one of the stepford ones, or at least somewhere in between. They surely won’t be an Annie & Allie, but I love them to pieces. I know one day, somehow, someway I will miss even this temporary madness. And yes, even before I go totally senile 😆 *
Twin moms share your thoughts!
(Also, share your favorite age with twins.)
Here’s to another day with multiples!