When Does Life With Twins Get Easier? What All Us Twin Mommies Want To Know!
A Little Growing Up Too Fast Rant, Followed By, When Does Life With Twins Get Easier?
(An interesting read to any parent of multiples, or parent in general, so pull up a seat and take a read).
I just cannot believe that my baby girls are already 3 months old! Where did that time go to? I really wish I could make it stop for awhile. I’m not ready to say good-bye to infancy, and hello to toddler-hood, not for a few more decades, please Lord, just kidding, but you know what I mean, it’s going far too fast!
Everyday when I pick them up, I sware I can feel them grow heavier and heavier. It’s exciting, yet very sad to me, to see and feel the changes going on. I mean every phase and change that kids go through from birth on up, is exciting, and has it’s wonderful pro’s to it, (and con’s), but I’m just not ready to move on, into the next phase just yet. I noticed the new baby smell is no longer, and that alone is so sad to me. As the ever so beautiful, yet ever so sad (Be prepared for a tear jerkin, if you decide to listen to this one), Darius Rucker sings, ‘It won’t be like this for long,’, and it never is. Simply gorgeous song, but just tugs at the heart strings so much, they nearly snap!
I was thinking yesterday about how I have always wondered, when is the hardest time with twins, and when does it get easier? I remember googling this when I was still pregnant, because I believed, at the time, best to educate myself, as to what I was in for, but seriously was sorry that I did that, because I worried too much over what I read, and expected worse then what was the reality, so while knowledge is power, it’s not always good when mixed with pregnancy hormones. Also, as my husband has told me, time and again, people rarely share the good on the Internet, they like to share their war stories, and horrors, and people with the good, just kind of tend to move on with their lives, so if this is true, which does seem the case mostly, then searching the Internet certainly causes more woe, then you need in your life especially when pregnant, but I digress….
Most people say the 1st 3 months with twins are the hardest. Nothing magical happened yesterday after 4 PM, when the girls turned 3 months, to lead me to believe that is true yet, he he, but to me, personally the 1st 2 months were easy, actually the 1st 6 weeks were the easiest so far in my opinion, but all babies are different. We didn’t have an awfully hard adjustment period like you read about, and I expected hell, but to my great suprise, things sort of started flowing nicely, right from the start. The thing I will agree with, is that sleep makes everything easier, so when they are 2-3 months old, sleeping better, hence you are sleeping better, it really can make a difference in your mood and in the entire day, really.
My thoughts at this point, is I’m afraid of the mobility of two small children at once. I only have two eyes, so how do I keep them under my radar at all times, keeping them perfectly safe, every second of the day? They will be running in different directions at some point I am sure. Right now, just knowing, that I can put them down, and run to the bathroom, and they can’t roll off the bed, or rummage through any kitchen cabinets, is extremely comforting to me. I’m scared of the crawling and walking days, honestly. With my others I pushed it, helping them crawl and then walk as soon as they could, this time girls, TAKE YOUR TIME, IT’S ALRIGHT, ha, be as lazy as you would like to be.
But seriously, I think there is no true easy point of parenthood at all, and different stages of childhood aren’t necessarily easier, but are different, so we shouldn’t really be too frightened of them, after all, they will be coming, whether we like it or not. It’s just like the age ‘ol debate amongst parents, on what is easier, having girls or having boys, and I sware, it just doesn’t have anything to do with the sex of the child (not until 14 anyhow *wink*), it honestly has all to do WITH the child themselves, and not their genetic make-up. Girls can be hard, boys can be hard, I have had both, there is really no true way to fairly compare, and I guess it’s the same with twins, and which phases are the easiest and the hardest. Some will sware the best is when they are older, when some will sware the opposite, there is just no way to get this kind of information over the Internet. It’s a very personalized thing.
This I read towards the end of my pregnancy, and though I would share it here, It’s quite smartly written.
Things get easier, as the babies start to sleep for longer periods of time , and hence, so do their parents! Things get easier when the babies are able to maintain a more regular schedule, so that the parents can then plan around feeding times & nap times, and maybe actually accomplish some other chores inbetween. (we are waiting on this one).
Things get easier when the babies smile & laugh in response to their parents, and to each other. Things get easier when the babies can hold their own bottles or feed themselves. (No denying that one. I have got carpul mummy syndrome over here, from so many feedings:)
Things get easier when the babies begin to crawl, because they no longer have to be carried every where. Then things get easier when they can walk on their own. (Right now, debatable in my opinion, but we’ll see).
Things get a lot easier after they have been potty trained and you are FINALLY, done with diapers! (Extra $ around to!). Things get easier when they can buckle themselves into and out of the car without any help. Things get easier when they outgrow their stroller, and walk like big boys or girls. Things get easier when they can dress themselves in the morning, brush their own hair and wash their own hands.
Life is easier when they start going to school or all day long. Things get easier when they become old enough to fix their own lunches. Things get easier when they can stay home alone without needing a babysitter. They can help do the dishes, make their own bed, & take the telephone messages. (Long, long, ways away!). Things get easier when they get a drivers license, and you don’t have to play chauffer, driving everyone around to and fro. And life gets a lot easier when they get themselves a job, and one day move away from home. (A day my own parent’s couldn’t wait for, but one, I am not so eager for!).
Yet still, with all of these milestones, parenting multiples doesn’t ever get “easy.” There will be moments when parents say, “Wow, this really isn’t so bad. I’ve got this under control!” And days when they think, “Life is good, and just look at how far we have come.” But then of course, there will be times when they look back fondly on the “hard times” ,and wonder exactly what they were complaining about, that was such a breeze in comparison, to something else.
Somehow the diaper changes, frequent nighttime wakings and feeding schedules, of infancy, do seem quite manageable, when they are compared with a double dose of drivers licenses, dating disasters, and a whirlwind of sports & school activities. (Let’s not forget the womanly hormones…EEK x’s 3 in this household, 4 with me, but I don’t count, I’m always nice *smile*, but I’m sure we’ll survive this as well. I’m not too scared).
Being a parent is never easy, despite the amount of money you have, or how well your kids behave. Raising children is a big job, and it is just plain hard. Because you love them so much, and want the very best for them, you can never do enough for them, and can’t protect them, or love them enough, it just isn’t possible. Nothing is ever enough for your precious children. They literally are, your heart walking, outside of your body.
Humans are imperfect, there are no perfect parents and every parent wonders whether their best is good enough for their children, who deserve so much better. We can only do the very best we can, and forgive ourselves for any little imperfections along the way!
I added a little of my own wit to that article, I just think that is so perfectly said, and if one thing in life you can always be sure of, is change. It’s never more then a heartbeat away.
Ok, here is a 3 month ‘Birthday’ pic of the girls. As you can see it’s getting increasingly hard to get any decent photograph of the two together, and I can’t afford a pro to come into my home, and spend three hours with them, for a couple good prints, so I’ll have to keep trying. I remember these times with my others, and now everybody poses nicely, so It’s temporary, but with one subject to work with…hard enough, x’s two, well, you twin mom’s catch my drift.
Later Gator’s. Have a terrific week, and I’ll be back soon…Always am!
Annie looks frightened, then Allie Looks frightened to! Not an easy task to take pics any more of two at a time.
Out of 25 shots, here they look happiest!
Gotto try harder next time. Happy birthday My Twincesses!
OH, and if you haven’t already, become a follower on my twitter page (Twinpossible), and/or, you can do both if you want, but not necessary, become a facebook fan, please do do it, and you could win an awesome nookie/toy, called a WubbaNub. (See fun stuff page for details). As you can see below, my Annie just loves hers. I gotto find out where I misplaced Allie’s *blush*.