Only 3 More Days….
Only 3 More Days….
The twincesses are 11 months, 3 weeks, & 4 days old.
Oh how I remember these days! 😥
Until my little baby girls turn 1. How can it be? It feels like maybe they have been around for 1/2 of that,, but certainly not a full 12 months time!
It scares me to think they’ll be 2 years old in the exact same blink of an eye. It honestly makes me want to bawl my eyes out. I want to be happy, but it’s more sad to me then anything else. I don’t want to say ‘my babies are 1.’ It’s weird enough saying their 11 months, because it doesn’t feel like it.
Why did God give us the shortest month of the year before their big day? I feel gypt! Am I being ridiculous or what? I’m sure later in life they will love that their birthday is right after February, (until after 30 anyhow), but for now.. I hate it. I want those extra 3 days. At least let it be a leap year! Oh well. Not until 2012.
On top of the planning for their party, which the REAL one…the big one, will be on the 6th, I have been quite stressed about the whole thing. I just want it to go off without a hitch. I don’t remember being as obsessed before, but in a way, I guess you could also call it a kind of ‘going out’ party for me to. Mourning that I will never be celebrating another 1 year old’s birthday again, until I have grand children, but never again will it be with one of my own. **Weep** 😥 .
Anyhow, yesterday was just dreadful. Actually it all started several days ago when we all went to my mom’s house for a friendly visit, and she hid the little information that she was SICK from us! The following day I woke up feeling dreadful and had a bad sore throat.
As soon as I told hubby, ‘Oh God, I’m getting sick. Please Lord not now.’ He said to me, he had heard my mom whisper something about being sick to my step dad, and he said, ‘Shhh’ to her. Hub didn’t mention it to me, because he thought it must have meant nothing. Nobody looked sick, and then who would do that? My step dad was in bed sick, when I called my mom yesterday. They knew. GRR!
Nice grandmother to be so selfish as to expose her family, especially babies to her germs, and pretend she is well, and so close to their birthday. I have been so stressed out ever since, that their birthday may now be ruined by illness. Their pictures..everything, because of this! If they get sick it’s all over. I’ll be more upset then words can say.
We put a down payment on the place, I have pictures scheduled, invites all sent, I would DIE if they got sick now, so I’m trying my best to keep my germs away, but Mikayla is already stuffed up and coughing, and hubby not feeling well. I’m praying so hard God spares the rest of my exposed family. I’m so angry. I have been so careful with them. Illness pretty much ruined their 1st Christmas, Please dear Lord don’t let them get sick for this special occasion.. Not their 1st birthday.
So yesterday I wake up after a good 3 hours of sleep, which I can NOT function on. It’s different with the hydrenaline rush of having newborns. Now I was used to my sleep again, and I was utterly exhausted. The girls had been insanely fussy the night prior. They are getting into a really bad habit here of crying to be picked up, and not wanting to be released, and quite frankly, I only have so many arms, and I need to sleep at some point to. I have to break this cycle.
Plus, despite being in different room, I really think they are starting to ‘twin talk’ to one another. They oddly are waking up at the same time, and you can hear similar noises going back and forth. It’d be cute outside of being 2 am. We have a lot to work on, as I fear there is more then teething going on here.
Then I got a call from dear mom that my sister in law is moving away with my god son. He’s been a part a huge part of my life for nearly 17 years. More of my life then his own fathers even. He’s like one of my own! He was born the year before my 1st son was born. His mom was one of those that could be on the show ‘I didn’t know I was pregnant.’ I saw her days before and no one had any clue. Incredibly bizarre. That is the only reason I believe any of those stories are true, out of her experience.
Anyhow, I knew they were putting the house up for sale and contemplating moving a few states away, but it’s been going on for a long time, in a bad market. So while I have thought about it, hub calmed me down that it won’t be any time soon. My mom said definitively to me yesterday, that they sold the house and are moving to Georgia. GEORGIA? Where the hell did Georgia come from? I started crying my eyes out. Finally my husband seeing me in disarray called up my ex sister in law.
The house is NOT sold yet, and she wanted to know where my mother got Georgia from? Is my mom totally losing it, or trying to upset me for no good reason? This isn’t the 1st game she has played with me, but I have no clue why. I was VERY upset.
Then I get a letter in the mail that some tests I had done at the doctor, are NOT going to be covered by our insurance, and I owe a nice chunk of change, which we do not have. Then I noticed a boggie in one of the twin’s noses and went into absolute panic mode. I’m so worried about them getting sick.
Then the upstairs TV went on us without reason. Oh, did I mention hubby came home from work yesterday morning telling me he had gotten pulled over on his way to work, and then at work, he got into an accident with one of the trucks? Nobody was hurt, but he’s very close on the ‘snip snip’ list of seniority now in comparison to the guys left, still beneath him.
So many have already been laid off, and he’s 49 years old, so he’s really nervous how this accident may impact his job. Thank God he didn’t get hurt. He said he was exhausted and falling alseep, and that is how it happened. Comforting for a wife to know, huh?
I worry about him every night. He does NOT get nearly enough sleep. I get so nervous. He just can not sleep with any noise around him, and try as I might, even on separate floors, he hears absolutely everything. What’s a girl to do? He even takes ambien without much of any help. He needs to go to a sleep clinic or something. That or a hotel! I’m at such a loss for him. Noise cancelling headphones do nothing for him. Any way to sound proof a room?
I had forced him to go into work that night. He was going to stay home because both babies were wailing when he was leaving, but I didn’t want him to put his job into jeopardy with another absence, plus we SO need the money. He was already warned about absences since the twins were born, and now is not the time to play around. Imagine now, if he lost his job over the fender bender? I’d feel awful. Worse yet, what if he had lost his life? That is what happened to my grandfather.
I never met him, but he died on his night off, after my grandmother told him his work called, and if he wanted to make some overtime he could come in. She told him to go, and that they could go see the movie another night. He never came home. He was only 26 years old. I can’t imagine that kind of guilt. Anyhow, hub did hobble in complaining about hurting his side during the night, but it was not being because of the accident.
He needs a computer to get something else going, because this job is killing him. I sold everything I could on eBay to give him money to buy a computer, not the best but something to get his websites going, and try and help him be able to get out of his current position, as his PC died on him some time ago, and he ended up using the money for bills.
Ok, back to yesterday. I later on in the day took my older, lately jealous again, (because of the upcoming birthday of the twins) daughter, to the carosel in the afternoon, for some one on one time. I felt like I could vomit after all of those rides. Up & down, round & round. They never punched our ticket so we went around like 20 times for free. I wanted to barf. After the lack of sleep, being spun that long, felt like a massive hangover.
This is an indication of where my head was at yesterday. I bring my camera, made sure I had space on the memory card, and everything, got the case, put it in, was sure to have it near, but it doesn’t turn on at the carousel. WHY? Mama possible, went and forgot to take the camera battery she had charging, out of the stinkin’ wall! UGH!
Seriously, the only good thing that happened yesterday, is that the beautiful outfits that were made for my girl’s very special 1st birthday, arrived in the mail. Seeing those REALLY made me smile, because they are just beautiful. I can not wait for you to see them to, but for right now, not happening. 😀
They are custom made by Stitcheroos, and they are amazing! They do such incredible work. You will see shortly, but can visit their website to view some of their items. If you have a special occasion GIDDY UP! You would NOT be disappointed, believe me there.
Ok..I talked long enough. As long as the house doesn’t burn down today, a diaper doesn’t explode, the roof doesn’t collapse, or any more throats get sore..we are in good shape here! Wish me luck on that. Oh, and Allie last night waved and said, in her own cute way, ‘bye bye,’ over & over again last night. It was so precious. I’m going to try and get it on tape today for you all.
1 yr. old VS. 2 yr. old
Gimme that ball, you bully!
Check out this shirt worn by my friend’s DD. A laugh in my face? I guess I could get the girls a, ‘Just be glad I’m not a triplet’ shirt.
Or you could have one t-shirt saying, ‘Just be glad I’m not a twin.’ Then the other saying, ‘Oh darn..I forgot. My bad.’ 😆
PS– Sorry if this made little sense in places. My 5 yo hasn’t stopped talking to me for one key stroke. Quite distracting. She just can’t control that yapper!! Funny what’s she’s making though. I’ll share tomorrow. Ewe, she just got glue on my keyboard. Got to go before disaster strikes! Thank God for an easy going son! 😆